7 Weird Things That Happen to Your Body When You Die

Do you have a will? Do you have a plan for your Facebook page? Death isn’t pretty and isn’t pleasant to think about. But it’s a natural part of life, even if you won’t be around to see it. You should know what’s going to happen. Check out these seven weird things that happen to your body when you die.

  1. Your muscles completely relax

    There’s nothing going on upstairs to tell them otherwise. Yes, this means your bladder and bowels will probably evacuate. Embarrassing. Luckily, it happens to everyone. Also — you’ll be dead.

  2. Your brain cells start dying

    Just like the rest of you. After about three minutes, all higher thought processes will end. By the end of the fifth minute, your eyeballs go glassy and flat. Before ten minutes are up, your brain stem shuts down … forever.

  3. Your body goes to the doctor

    When you think about it, it is pretty weird. If you die young, unexpectedly, or for any other reason require a postmortem exam, your body will have one. Doctors slice you open, look at your entrails, and figure out exactly why and how you died. If you haven’t had a check-up in a while, don’t worry — you can make time for the doctor when you’re dead.

  4. Your body begins to digest itself

    Blood pools in the veins, fluids secrete, and you start eating yourself. Upon death, the pancreas will digest itself, and microbes within the intestines will begin to eat through the walls. That is, if you’re left for dead in a desert somewhere. (These things happen between one and two days after death if your body is not sent for aftercare.) Hope you have insurance, because you do not want to go out this way.

  5. You get brought back to life

    When you die, lots of small postmortem processes begin. Hospitals call a person dead when heartbeat, blood circulation, and breathing all stop. This is called “clinical death.” Biological death, on the other hand, happens five minutes later. We think of death as a moment, but it’s actually a process. Cells begin to die, fluids are released, and blood begins to pool. Additionally, it’s possible to be revived from clinical death on, for example, an operating table. Thousands of people report near-death experiences, or have similar stories of what happens when we “die.” It might push science and common perception past their logical limits, but it’s a weird truism of the human experience.

  6. Your nails and hair keep growing

    It’s not that weird, but it’s going to happen. Your nails and hair are already dead proteins, and you might as well face the fact that your perfect hair and manicure will be screwed up after death. Luckily, you won’t be there to see it. And if you’re buried, cremated, or turned into fireworks

    promptly, no one else will see it, either.

  7. It gets dressed up

    If you choose to be embalmed and have an open casket funeral, your body will be filled with formaldehyde. A mortician will then slather cake-like stage makeup on your corpse to make it look like it’s you, only sleeping. After that, your corpse gets dressed up in your Sunday best. While similar practices have been a common practice over many cultures for thousands of years, the entire process seems creepy to us. Consider more environmentally friendly forms of aftercare, such as donation of your organs and cremation.